What Would I Say To My Younger Self? (Giveaway: Win a Google Nexus 7)

Oh, there are so many things I could say to my younger self if I had the chance. I might point out running down that bank of rubble in high-heeled boots is not a good idea, it would certainly save the torn ligaments and months of pain. Or I might have to point out that the note that we were given as change in the Los Angeles' petrol station was in fact not $100 but a $1,000,000 Monopoly money note.

Possibly we had 'tourist' written on our heads that day.

But on a more serious note, what would I say to my younger self?

This is a novel one for me, because essentially I believe everything happens for a reason, and that these events shape our lives; giving us new direction. I also feel it is better to regret something that you have done than something you haven't.

However, I'm willing to be a little reflective:

To the 13 year old using a pair of scissors to cut off the legs of her jeans and make them into shorts?

  • Close the blades of the scissors and put them on the floor. Don't leave them in your hand pointing towards your knee when you are adjusting your kneeling position. It will save your three hours in A&E.

To the 17 year old sixth-former who couldn't see a way through the bullying?

  • Hold your head up high lovely, this is one year of a very happy life, and she is not worth getting upset about. Listen to your mum and she will help you. And the people who aren't there for you are not friends.

To the 20 year old girl who lacked confidence in her appearance and thought she wasn't the attractive one of the group?

  • Take a long, hard look in the mirror my love, because you're wrong. You are young and vibrant. You've got a beautiful smile and sparkly eyes. Your hair is amazing. You've got a wonderful figure and your posture rocks. Have some more confidence in yourself and keep smiling!

To the 24 year old booking her honeymoon in Paris?

  • Don't! Paris is cold at the end of December. Really cold! Plus you're vegetarian and will not be able to find anything to eat apart from pizza or curry for five days. This will result in you eating a dodgy crepe and having food poisoning, cutting short the end of your honeymoon. Go somewhere hot and sunny instead!

To the 35 year old who thinks she's got plenty of time left to have another child, and has listened to too many other women who have convinced her that she has birth trauma following The Boy's birth?

  • They don't know what they're talking about, you're fine. And DON'T leave it! Just don't! Time will crack on and before you know it you'll be staring 40 in the eye and struggling to fall pregnant.

To the 37 year old falling asleep on the sofa last night?

  • GO TO BED! It's midnight and you're tired!

What advice would you give your younger self?

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  1. says

    Enjoy the time with R and stop worrying what others think and what wil happen tomorrow. Talk every minute and make the most of it

    Don't waste over £5000 on a new tarmaced driveway that would be ruined within 6 months – cowboys

    Try not to take everything personally.

    and on another note I am still keeping everything crossed (in a virtual way) that you get your wish

  2. says

    I would tell her everything is for a reason and all the things she goes through shape her to be the person she is today. SO all in all nothing, as I wouldn't change a single thing, even the heartache and the hard times.

  3. Elizabeth (Liz) Briggs says

    I would tell my younger self – Enjoy every moment, take more photos, go to university, go to concerts and festivals, spend more time with your grandparents whilst you can, don't worry about what (you think!) others are thinking about you, you are NOT Fat!

  4. says

    Oh lovely, I love this post, it is so difficult to see our way through when those things really are such big things at the time. Now, I keep having to say to myself that in a few months this will have just been a blink of the eye, but it is so difficult when you are living every moment. I hope you have found yourself enough to find the time to appreciate you. You are amazing.

  5. says

    I wish my younger self had understood a parent's unconditional love. And that I needed to forgive myself for the mistakes I made, not worry about them forgiving, forgiveness had never been a part of their consideration. They really did just only ever want me to be happy- and no matter how many time they told me I never believed them!

  6. says

    I love this post … here goes

    To the 12 year old girl – your parents are splitting up, the next four years are going to be incredibly hard but things will get easier. Oh and hide the brandy bottle from your broken mother.

    To the 18 year old girl – it doesn't matter that you decided education wasn't for you, you will go on to have a very successful career that didn't require a higher education after all.

    To the 30 year old about to be married – take that pregnancy test, you always said you were going to on your wedding eve however you didn't. If you had you would have found out that you were 8-weeks pregnant and what a great announcement that would have been!

    To the 34 year old who is so undecided about her new blog design – go with your gut!

    KA x

  7. says

    I am another great believer of everything happens for a reason and shapes you as a person. The one thing I would say to my younger self at 18/19/20, appreciate your Mum and make sure she knows how much you love her, you have a lot less time with her than you think.

  8. says

    To my 13 year old self:
    Do NOT eat all that rice pudding, don't listen to your mum and dump that guy you are dating, he's not worth spending the next 7 years with.

  9. Stephanie Coals says

    Do what you want to do with your life and don't take the path that others want for you just to make them happy – do what makes you happy!

  10. Emily P in DC says

    You are not your school accomplishments. The things that seem like the end of the world right now will not matter at all in the future. Never say no to cuddles with your little boy (or your husband)!

  11. says

    Oh darling, such a touching post, loved it. To always go with my gut , sorry about your stint in A & E and Paris is cold in the winter (eek about the food poisoning) too but all these experiences shape us, hugs x

  12. says

    I would tell my 27 year old self to NOT go on that date with that emotionally unavailable Redneck who would waste 2 years of your life and give you nasty flashbacks for the rest of your life! Bleurgh!

    Karin xx

  13. kayleigh Bates says

    I love this post. I'd tell myself that it will all work out in the end. You'll get over him and be ridiculously happy with your husband and children

  14. William Gould says

    DO NOT start smoking, and save AT LEAST 10% of everything you earn. Then you could retire before 60 and not 66 as I have to!

  15. says

    When you get that job when you're 19 that means working away from home for 6 weeks don't turn it down. Don't be a wimp! You'll miss the chance of being in at the start of something that's huge in the age of technology.

  16. says

    learn to think before you open your mouth and shove your big foot in it. That your daughter who was given less than 6 hrs to live at 4 weeks old and spent 13 years of her life in and out of hospital will grow up to be an amazing woman so dont spend hours/weeks/months/years worrying about her

  17. Danielle Graves says

    To the 16 year old me who was desperate to be loved and so in a terrible relationship I would say speak out, don't be afraid to tell people what is happening and ask for help

    To the 22 year old me I would say like yourself, you are lovely and you deserve to be happy

    To the 25 year old me I would say don't be afraid to admit that mummyhood isn't exactly how you pictured it. PND is nothing to be ashamed of.

  18. Tracy C says

    To me of the last 5 or 6 years – Remember it's true that life is what happens when you're making other plans, just get on and do things.

    And to me of just under 5 years ago, never pay too much attention to doctors. They tend to tell you the worst, you will find time and again that beautiful girl proves them all wrong.

  19. says

    21 is not on the shelf you don't need to marry him, you are young, beautiful and smart, travel, take risks, learn but just don't do it.

    Yes 25 is very young to get divorced but you are in a violent marriage and have to do it, yes mum will I say I told you so for the next 20 years, but that's ok.

    Dont second guess it, the move to England will be the best thing you have ever done.

    Oh and to my 8 year old self -In the future you won't have to dial numbers on a phone. You won't need a phone book or an address book or to memorise numbers. We will all have little boxses that have touch screens and everything you ever need to know contained inside them. Marvellous!

  20. Lynne OConnor says

    Take full advantage of the social life at university. Don't go home at weekends to spend it with a boyfriend who isn't worth it

  21. Alex Telford says

    Lovely post,

    To my 8 yr old self – don't leave your homework until the last minute, it will become a tricky habit to break later in your education.

    To my 17 year old self, although he has your best interests at heart, do the a levels and degree modules that you want to do, not the ones dad thinks Will be the best for your career, you need to enjoy what you're doing to have the motivation to do it.

    To my 18 yr old self – make more of an effort with your friends, rather than your boyfriend. You'll end up marrying him, so have a lifetime for cosy nights in with dvds, but you'll miss that special relationship with your friends.

    To my 21 yr old self, go to America the summer you graduate, you will both get jobs and won't have another chance for a three week break. Before you know it 5 years will have passed and you will have had a baby and will have missed the chance. (Maybe when you retire?!?)

    To 23 yr old self. It's your wedding, not your mil' s, do what you want, leave when you want to. Enjoy it, don't spend the day worrying about what people thought of it!

  22. says

    God, what wouldn't I say?

    I suppose I'd tell my younger self that no matter how bad things got or how terrible the people in my life were going to be, everything will be worth it eventually. And to ditch that horrid woman who called herself my mother. What a waste of time! I'd urge myself to move into my own place and give all men a wide berth. I'd tell myself to travel and find a way to try to eliminate insomnia.

    Mostly I'd tell myself that tomorrow turns out ok, despite how long it takes to get there and how much suffering is endured along the way. And that I'm sorry about August 2006. Some things, no matter how much you want them, are outside of your control.

  23. says

    Oh gosh there is so much I would love to tell her… hahaha Probably mostly don't be a people person be your own person! Would have had more fun that way!

  24. says

    don't be scared to ask for help after having JR post natal depression is nothing to be ashamed of and despite what certain family members tell you he won't be taken away for admitting you're struggling.

  25. says

    Oh gosh that's a toughie isn't it? I always tell myself not to have regrets as every decision i've made has led to me being where I am today. However I would tell my teen-aged self that being grown up isn't all it's cracked up to be, I would encourage her to enjoy the carefree time and not wish it all away as the time will come where she wishes she made more of it.

  26. Angela Fitzjohn says

    Have confidence in yourself, do not listen to negative nasty comments, work hard and save hard, but most of all be happy with who you are, be kind to others, and smile, enjoy your life, you are only here once, make the most of it.

  27. nicci cowdell-murray says

    id say when the loud mouth show off shows you some attention , dont agree to go on a date with him !!! theres much better fish out there in the sea so dont settle for the first one to show interest !!!

  28. Stephanie Tsang says

    I would tell my younger self to never give up, experience as much as you can and never ever settle for second best.

  29. Amelia Kennedy says

    Don't start smoking – you've no idea how hard it is to try and give up! Also, save more and don't squander the cash.

  30. Barbara Bunning says

    aged 7 – don't try and ice skate on that piece of glass as it will leave your legs scarred forever
    aged 14 – Don't break your heart over your first love, much better will follow
    aged 21 – Cherish every moment of your first born and the 2 more that follow as they grow up so quick!

  31. Emma Birley says

    Probably the one main thing would be to learn how to drive, because you'll absolutely hate having to get the bus to and from work everyday! And you'll loathe that you can't just decide to go somewhere at the last minute, as it's constant planning for when to get a bus *grumble grumble* ;)

  32. Dominic Barbe says

    Find someone a bit older, a bit wiser than you; someone who really knows how to LISTEN. And talk to them – about everything.

  33. Mary says

    Remember, the only requisite for you to achieve anything is to want it badly enough – and believe. It may not happen immediately, but it will happen.

  34. justine meyer says

    To my 20 year old self – dump the fiance who has just got someone else pregnant you are much better than this

  35. Jessica Wilde says

    Don't ever start drinking alcohol – it will get you into so many places you don't want to be! Easier not to start, than to give it up later in life…
    Find ways of developing your self-confidence: it's easier at your age than it is at 29!

  36. Mo Ade says

    You know, things will work out in the end. Chill and enjoy where you are at right now. You don't know the future but you know who holds the future in His hands, this is more than enough to feel secure about what lies ahead. You'll see, you'll smile loads even though there'll be some tears too.

  37. sian hallewell says

    To me at 16, choose the subjects you love and enjoy for A level- you'll probably end up in univercity with a job you love!

    To me at 18, STOP, do not be an idiot and get married, go live with him = bet you don't survive 3 months!

  38. Amanda Beamish says

    When you look at yourself in the mirror and think you're fat and ugly, in 20 years you're going to WISH you're that fat and ugly. Enjoy it!

  39. Kirsten Murphy says

    To me at 13 – dig your heels in until they let you do art instead of physics & put in an official complaint about that creepy maths teacher

  40. Carolin says

    Don't rush growing up, you have more than enough time to be an adult for a veeeeery long time later on in life.

  41. Laura Marshall says

    To not let fear guide my life. To trust myself and the decisions I make and if you get a chance to have a nap always take it!

  42. Rachael Lines says

    I would say take more photos! – I lost a big period of my life because I only have memories to look back on, when I could have taken pictures of friends and family who are now lost to time and space. x

  43. Rebecca Morgan says

    Dear Rebecca….

    You've got a voice
    Just learn to speak.
    Life's confusing now
    But won't always be bleak.
    Say what's on your mind
    And dont be pushed around
    Listen to your heart
    And learn to stand your ground
    Listen to your parents
    Get your homework done.
    Go out with your friends
    And have a little fun!
    Childhoods not forever
    So enjoy each and every day
    Next time that you look,
    You'll be getting old and grey

  44. Laura Jeffs says

    Stop obsessing about finding love, concentrate your energies and effort on finding your career path instead ;-)

  45. Ellie Bevan says

    Make the most of your daughter when she is small – one day her bio dad will want to be involved, and when that happens you will miss her more than you thought you could!

  46. Richard Rowley says

    Don't go for that second interview at Tarmac when you know the job is not right for you (and avoid a berk with no brakes writing your car off on the way home)

  47. says

    have more fun!
    my dad always tried to encourage me to go out with friends, have fun, be a teenager! instead i was trying to be grown up and letting blokes dictate my life, then at 20 i had my first baby and that was the end of it, im now 24 and i have no stories of mis-spent youth, of crazy days and the nights i dont remember. take advantage of the here and now, you dont know whats around the corner.

  48. vicky cockett says

    be strong; you might feel small and might be told your insignificant but one day you will be somebody's whole world xx

  49. Tracy B says

    I'd tell my younger self not to listen to those who bring you down. Dreams can come true, you just have to believe in them.

  50. katy c johnston says

    Don't waste your time on worrying what people think, or what you THINK people MIGHT think about you! Go out and do what you want while you still have the chance :)

  51. Rebecca Taylor says

    Work hard, things can happen but you need to make them happen, you cannot rely on other people to do it for you, love your mummy!

  52. Travis Faulkner says

    You're ADD get over it its fine. Dont get so fat, and dont study communications. Its not worth the money, get an osha degree and make lots of money.

  53. Jenny Harper says

    "Can't" should be removed from your vocabulary. You can be and do whatever you want with your life, as you only get one shot at it

  54. Stacie M says

    I think i would be pretty worried about changing things if i could go backand talk to my younger self, i would liked to have never started smoking but if i hadn't then i wouldn't have met my husband and would have never have my wonderful kids, the same if i had stayed at school or 100 other things. maybe the safest things would be to go back 10 months and tell myself that it is NOT going to take a few hours to pack up my house, myself, my husband and 4 kids and that it will NOT only take a few hours to unpack all of that aswell. I moved a couple of weeks before christmas witha 2 month old baby, 1year old, 2 year old and spent the whole month around christmas stressed and trying to cope with moving and 3 young kids. i wish i had packed better and not stressed about trying to get it all done right away. I'd probably also tell myself not to eat that chinese last week as i had an upset stomach the next day

  55. Emma Harris says

    I would love to go back and tell my younger self to apply myself at school, get good grades and go to Uni :)

  56. Joy Connor says

    Always hold your head up high, have belief and confidence in yourself, yes there are bad times but they are massively outweighed by the good, if at first you don't succeed try try again…oh and enjoy chocolate…just not too much!

  57. Claire Long says

    To the 13 year old me … Do not make that first cut, self harm will ruin your life and you won't be able to stop no matter how easy you think it will be to do :(

  58. Heather Knotts says

    Don't try to please everyone – they like you better if you don't give a damn what they think of you anyway!

  59. Tracey Belcher says

    Work to Live, Don't Live to Work. One LIFE is all you need if you do it right – Push your limits or you will never know how far you can go and Happiness is worth more than any bank balance

  60. Jeremy Hards says

    Start saving now, even if it seems very little as it will be too late by the time you realise you should be saving.

  61. says

    Id tell myself to not listen to the constant bullying i had to put up with day in day out, to take more chances, let myself be more confident and try not to overly worry about everything. It all get better eventually.

  62. barbara madden says

    not to worry about the things i cant change and to change the things i worry about that i can. if i had done this then i would'nt be suffering with my nerves

  63. Deanne Harrison says

    I would say to my younger self, there will be a special man comes into your life when your older, treasure every second with him. His name is Walter Hartwell White :)

  64. Barbara Handley says

    Find out as much as possible about your paternal and maternal ancestors. I have spent over 20 years compiling my family tree but there are many questions only my late parents could have answered.

  65. Barbara Handley says

    Find out as much as possible about your paternal and maternal ancestors. I have spent over 20 years compiling my family tree but there are many questions only my late parents could have answered.

  66. Patricia Avery says

    Plan for tomorrow but don't waste time worrying about things you have no contol over. It is such a waste of time and energy that could be better used elsewhere :)

  67. Wendy Tolhurst says

    I would tell myself that the more you worry about things happening, the less likely they are to happen. Relax, enjoy yourself, and things will follow a natural progression.

  68. rachael jones says

    I would say ….. You know what you're doing carry on :)

    why ? because i dont have regrets , everything ive ever done ive done for a reason even if now my reason seems strange it was how i felt at the time s thats real.

  69. Lindy Hine says

    To a teenager I'd say – you know all those stupid things that old people say? – one day in the future you'll find yourself totally agreeing with them!

  70. Gill Mitchell says

    Everything you're going through is happening for a reason and helping to make you a better person, ready for a fantastic future.

  71. Kristy Brown says

    Don't doubt yourself – it wasn't your fault and the sooner you realise that with the correct guidance the sooner you will leave the burden to those that created it

  72. Michaela B says

    To my 27yr old self: Say sorry to your mum and stop being an idiot over nothing, it's all well and good thinking you'll talk to her and apologise tomorrow but 5 years later you're still kicking yourself that you never got that chance.

  73. Carrie Talbot-Ashby says

    If I could go back
    and talk to myself,
    I don't think I'd change a darn thing!
    Its just that despite
    having a pretty hard life,
    where I am now is just amazing.
    If I went back now,
    and said 'Do this!' Or 'Do that!'
    What if that changed who I am?
    I might get hit by a bus,
    or marry someone called Gus!
    or worse, end up allergic to Spam!
    So I'd leave things as they are,
    Well, I don't have any scars!
    And while things were bad I'm ok!
    I might have tons of advice,
    could tell myself to think twice,
    But I do so love my life this way! <3

  74. Louise A says

    my younger self was bullied badly as a teenager and I would say to her that it ends and her life will end up being better than her bullies

  75. Vicky Robinson says

    I would tell my teenage self to ignore the bullies and be confident and happy with who I am and what I look like – that the bullies would later apologize to me and tell me that they had no idea why they did it.

    I would also tell my 27 year old self that my sickly, underweight first baby needs to a tonsil adenoidectomy with grommets fitting so that we could skip a year and a half of worry with him being very ill while no Dr actually diagnosed the problem! (It was finally done when he was 2.)

  76. Claire Davies says

    Everything in your life is a reflection of choices that you made. If you want a new outcome, make a different choice.

  77. Rachel Butler says

    Ah! There is so so much I should tell my younger self…..But the most important things would be:

    Don't smoke….it's a waste!
    Take your time….slow down!
    Save some money!
    Have your babies early!
    And do you really really need that bit of cake? You'll regret it later! Lol!

  78. Susan Carruthers says

    Always appreciate your older relatives and talk to them while you have the chance, they won't be with you forever.

  79. Sarah says

    Try to make more friends in uni even though you made the right choice of boyfriend :) and try and stick at your first career based job a bit longer than 4 years!!

  80. Katie Skeoch says

    Other people's opinions ultiately don't matter – it's your life so make decisions on what's best for you!

  81. says

    Love your messages to yourself.
    Mine would be to my 22 year old self: believe yourself when you tell your then boyfriend that you wished you'd meet again in 10 years time. In 10 years time he makes the perfect husband!

  82. katherine fay says

    Your childhood won't last forever. Work harder , study better , one day you will learn that it doesn't matter what others say. Live your dream and fuel your ambition. Don't quit university…..go back. Don't grow up with regrets , fight for what you want and keep trying. One day you will be where I am……happy.

  83. Alexander Beaven says

    In my 20's I'd say get out of the habit late nights as you'll find it a very hard to break as you get older

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