Most Annoying Children’s T.V. Programmes

KateTakes5 has come up with a very interesting topic this week. I was quite anal for the first year and didn't let The Boy watch any television, with the exception of the very occasional '3rd and Bird' episode. The box may have been on in the background with my daily fix of Phil and Holly, but no children's programmes. I know, cruel hey? I also didn't let him have any sugar, salt or processed food until 1yr old either. How times have changed…

I am rather controlling in what I let him watch. My fantastic mum looks after him while I'm working and I was getting a bit fed up of coming home, turning on the television and finding certain channels on. No I don't mean dodgy ones, I'm talking the American channels (I know that seems Xenophobic but it is not. My child is British, I want him to grow up with a British accent not one learnt from the Disney Channel). In my head is that advert from a few years ago: The Wombles with an American accent. Therefore having asked her not to have Cartoonito or the Disney channel on a million times, but still finding them in use I blocked them on sky+. Yes, I used the parental controls on my mother!

Basically this list is easy for me, anything that's not on CBeebies or BabyTV is pretty much a no-no. There are some decent programmes on Nick Jnr as well. Snob I know, but I may as well get my money's worth from my licence fee. However I can identify these programmes as irritating the hell out of me, and yes some of them are on my beloved CBeebies.

1) Barney. He is a big purple dinosaur. He looks nothing like a dinosaur and they weren't purple. I don't care that he teaches the children about being kind and sharing, he's a purple dinosaur! The child actors on it are sickly sweet and schmaltzy and they do my head in. No! Not in this household.

2)  LazyTown. The rubber masks are slightly alarming aren't they? They look like the Dead Presidents about to rob a bank. And it's not very realistic: Stephanie is actually about 22 and The Boy would have no concept that Robbie Rotten is naughty so why subject him to it?

3) Gigglebiz. Justin Fletcher may well have an MBE and it is well deserved. I think that every mother should be given a voucher to use that entitles them to 3hrs of childcare courtesy of Mr. Tumble to be redeemed in person in extreme cases of tiredness. The man is a genius and 'Something Special' is a firm favourite in this house with all of us. However 'Gigglebiz' is not funny: as I see it, it's a cross between 'Little Britain' and 'Benny Hill', both of which leave me reaching for the remote control. I think he's tried to indulge his love of slapstick and enforced it on children. No thank you.

4) Teletubbies. I actually like the programme and so does The Boy, but he gets really upset and cries when they disappear over the hills. I can't allow my child to develop separation anxiety for a red creature with a flipping circle on its head and a television in its stomach! So it stays off for the moment.

5) Spongebob Squarepants. I don't get it. That's all I have to say on the matter.


While I'm at it, remember this advert?

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    • TheBoyAndMe says

      Good lord no, she doesn't even own a computer let alone know what a blog is! She has no idea how to turn a computer on!

  1. says

    Lol at you blocking the channels from your Mum!

    I love Barney, the kids are not too fussed but I think he is fab! and as for that advert, it really was the best in the world. I was sat there going I love Bagpuss, ohh and Mr Ben…

    Mich x

  2. says

    Great list, we do watch Barney but I'm pleased when I find something in English, american or otherwise! ( We do watch Greek cartoons but lots are in Arabic – I don't want Leo to hear Arabic and get confused, and the Greek cartoons are rubbish!)

    Am also ashamed to say Gigglebiz has made me laugh on occaison, that's not good is it! Never seen Spongebob and don't intend to if I can help it!

    Great list, and thank you for reminding me of that brilliant advert!

  3. Johanna says

    My girls mostly watch CBeebies or CBBC. My youngest watches a lot more TV than her elder sister did at that age (3 1/2). She has has recently decided that she does not like 'Show Me, Show Me' so we switch over to CITV. She likes Pocoyo but it comes with adverts! So now all I get is 'I like that toy! I want that!'
    Favourites are Charlie and Lola, Come Outside, Shawn the Sheep, Scooby-do and MI High.
    I hate Gigglebiz but the girls seem to like it. E won't watch Zing-Zilas or Show me, Show Me. R moans about having to watch anything on CBeebies.

    • TheBoyAndMe says

      Won't be too long before E has outgrown CBeeebies though? I think that's why hubby & I like the channels that we do because it means we don't have to put up with the pressure from adverts!

  4. says

    It seems we share a hatred on this weeks listography! But I do LOVE Sponge bob, I can't help it. All together now . . ."Whooooooooo lives in a pineapple under the sea?"

  5. Mammy woo says

    OK, first off.
    Blocking you rmum with the sky plus remote is genius!! I love it!!

    BUT OH MY! I honestly couldnt live without the disney channel. Maybe its cos i worked there, but the one thing i was looking forward to after birth was getting that channel on and having an excuse to watch it! I think its me who forces bear in the big blue house on Addison and not the other way around!

    Teletubbies is torture. And for some reason it feels wrong. i dont know why.

    i had never really watched ceebeebies untill while we were in spain and we accidentally stumbled across waybaloo. Which he loves. BUT I HATE. i mean the music is ok i guess, but why are the kids dubbed? it is SO annoying!!

    Sponge bob winds me up. Especially as it seems to be adults which love it more?? I don't get it either.

    Great post as always. Apologies for taking ages to reply!

    I was shocked when i first read it. I was like 'no disney channel?!?!' she is mental. But you know… i love you so i will forgive you…

    PS – M.I.C.K.E.YYYYYYYYY M.O.U.S.E will find you… he will…. lol x

  6. yummy mummy says

    Teletubbies is just wrong for a start aswell as in the night garden all they do is make noise and silly words at least with disney channels they talk like people and not a phonic sound


  1. […] of you who saw my Listography entry on children's television programmes will remember that I get a bee in my bonnet about our offspring being immersed in the accents and […]

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